March 19, 2010 – Infusion 3.2 – pure joy!

I’m exhausted now, otherwise feeling ok.  Before, during, and after chemo infusion, I need to take a lot of steroids.  Steroids are wonderful to counter Cisplatin’s side effects, but come with their own set including insomnia.  With today’s dose, I’m tired but not sleepy.  Ah well, insomnia ends with a good sleep.  I’ll get Rudy Dog to cuddle with me.  He is the nap inducer king!

We had a wonderful surprise in the infusion room this morning.  I was in for hydration and reading a Jess Walter novel.  In walks a young couple who settle into the next chair, our cousins Darlene & Alan!  Alan is the son of my first cousin Anita, Arlene’s sister.  There are certainly far preferable places to run into family, but we had a lovely visit.  Alan is sweet and sincere and devoted to Darlene.  I’ve enjoyed conversations he and I have had in the past, conversations in the midst of family gatherings.  This morning we could focus on one another.  Ann & I haven’t had the opportunity to talk with Darlene before today.  She is a delight (she says “blankie”, too!), sparkling with her words, and strong in her fight with cancer.  She and I agree that Arlene is our hero as we ride the roller coaster of cancer treatments.  We both marked the end of intensive chemotherapy infusion (though we have the three week cycle ahead of us), she a longer course than I.  The treatments are a lengthy road and marking steps on the way shows progress and helps the spirit.

Ok, I’m going to stop and try that nap now.  The combination of insomnia fatigue and cottonball chemo brain make writing a bit of a challenge.

Back from the nap.  Rudy took in a sunbeam and then joined me on the couch.  He’s back in the sunbeam now.  If I didn’t have the 5FU pump, I might join him on the floor.  He looks comfy!

I wish I could be more effusive about the serendipity in the infusion room this morning, but my words are coming harder today.  The next couple of weeks I’ll be thinking, “this is the last dose of intensive chemo.”  I can really live in the day this cycle.

Ann told me I missed Dr. H’s comment yesterday after he poked and prodded looking for the lymph nodes in my neck.  He said his inability to find anything is a “complete response.”  I guess that’s good!  Ann & I are curious to see what the pre-radiation CT/PET scan will show.  We wonder what the current size of the alien mother ship (my primary tumor on the base of my tongue) is.

Thanks everyone for your support and love.  It’s an immeasurable comfort to know I have the embraces of friends & family on this journey.

Love…

Richard